I love watching this Bob Newhart sketch on MadTV in which he portrays a therapist helping a client with her phobia of enclosed spaces.
"Stop it" was his solution to anything she would say. Why can't we just stop our hurtful thoughts, feelings, or behaviors?
The roots of our most painful problems are so intertwined with the other aspects of the ways we think, feel, and behave. Change is less like turning off a light switch and more like dismantling a ticking bomb attached to the running engine of a helicopter 1,000 feet off of the ground filled with all your loved ones. Not so simple...
Whether the identified problem is an addiction, a toxic relationship, anger, depression, anxiety, eating disorder, psychosis, or criminal behavior, the solution is complex and unique to you. There is no "one size fits all" approach. This means your therapist has to get to know you and identify the unique strengths you can capitalize upon to make progress, which may take time.
What can I do in the mean time?
Slow down - If you are trying to change the way you think, feel, or behave, you may want to improve your awareness of the progression of how certain thoughts turn into feelings and influence your behavior.
Stay open - Listen to the complaints of others and to your complaints about them. What issues re-occur? How do you feel about these issues? How do you think your loved ones feel?
Identify a goal - What specifically do you want to change? If you woke up tomorrow and everything was "perfect", what would be different?
Find hope - Why do you want to change? Why now?
We understand that change is difficult and complex, but our job is to simplify it for you and guide you along this journey. If you're ready to take the first step, contact us.